Birth date: Aug 25, 1940 Death date: Sep 21, 2019
Nolen Bryant Cobb, age 79, of Woodville, Alabama passed away at him home on Saturday September 21, 2019. He was a machinist and wood worker. Mr. Cobb was an Air Force Veteran who served as an Air Loader Specialist 4 years Active Read Obituary
You know I wanted to leave good stuff. I was going to overlook all I went thru. But why mistreat my children? That started long before his illness. I still wanted to let it go but I found out about how my nieces; nephews; sis was treated. I just don’t get that. But It’s time to turn the page.
I used to dream of living on Cobb Rd with my dad. Now; I wish I could just erase him out of my memories.
Part 3. So I really wanted to track down the Cobb history. I was going to take a copy & give it to Nolen. Turns out there was another Cobb in Woodville back in the day. There were a bunch of Cobb’s from Georgia. Some were the Kent County Cobb’s. Some seemed fakes. Maybe released prisoners who took the Cobb name.
In secret I mailed letters. I paid people for research. A lot of times there is only old hand written books & records over there. I finally got hold of an old lady. She mailed me a handwritten document over a hundred yrs old. Said she found it in an old handwritten book. Said he was the only person who had ever asked for it. So I should have it. Said it was only proof she could find of my branch of Cobb’s before we left old world.
I had 3 storage buildings around the city for yrs. I only let people know about one. Paid cash for the others. My wife was very surprised to find that out finally. I kept that paper hit. It wasn’t a fancy modern document. Nearly impossible to read scrap of paper. Not even modern English.
Anyways; after Nolen treated my kids that way I got stuff out of safes & hidden places. All my old research. I asked my kids do any of you want this Cobb crap. Any of you want to honor Nilen & be his grandkid. They said they didn’t want it. So I took great pleasure as I cut up stuff; tore up stuff; & threw it all in the trash. I smiled when the big truck hauled it away.
You were more proud of your name than of me Nolen. I’ve been contacted. They asked if I’d take another DNA test to match it to the Old World. Nope. So far your family can only prove they are from Madison County. Who knows if that old lady was right. I annoyed a lot of people back then. No one cared about ancestry searches then. It’s possible that piece of paper wasn’t even from your family. But I will admit; I laughed my butt off as I tore it up. You should have never said that to my kids. A man of honor doesn’t act that way.
I don’t care. I wish I wasn’t a Cobb. I wish my wife had let me name my kids after her family. Nolen lacked honor. He didn’t deserve to have any of his kids or grandkids carry his name
But kids remember; he couldn’t help it. No one knew about autism or bipolar back then. Can you imagine how lost he felt in this world. He was probably afraid of so much. Probably why he lived in that little house like a hermit. He apparently also had bipolar. He’d get super depressed & pick something to lash out at. Sadly that was too often me. And you kids too. Maybe all of our prayers saved his soul. God does realize some people lack the ability to function & think correctly. But I owe him no loyalty whatsoever. I tried to make excuses for him my whole life. But the truth is what it is. I’ve been hurting inside for him; praying for him ever since I heard he had cancer. But I’m all tapped out. However; as a Christian I must have honor. So even though he apparently hated me my whole life, I will be the bigger man.
Nolen; I’m a son of God. I pray that God accepted your soul into Heaven. I pray Jesus found you. God Bless
One of the last times I saw Nolen he was very happy with my kids at first. Athletic; blond; blue; looked like Cobbs; smart. He leaned over & whispered to me that Angie wasn’t his & she was just coming up there to try to steal his land. He also brought up race. That confused me for a second. Then as I listened I got it.
I realize his generation was different. Race really mattered back then. So I won’t judge him on that. But here’s the deal. Heather & her Muslim Indian husband are very smart. There kids are smart; funny; & sweet. They didn’t need him. Ashley’s black son DeShawn is very sweet; kind; smart; & good at basketball. They didn’t need him. Angie bought land from my moms family. Shes building her own house. She didn’t need him.
He found out one of my kids has autism; & suddenly he didn’t want them either. He had a very high opinion of himself. But see I had some DNA for him. He didn’t want to see it. Then he’d have to admit he was full of crap. See Nolen had Iberian (Spanish) & Jew DNA in his blood. I looked like him; but was built larger & fairer like white people. He actually had the build; skin tone; & straight greasy dark hair of a Spaniard IMO.
What’s even funnier; he married my mom & had two kids with her. My mom is part black & Cherokee. He should have looked at those DNA results. But we can’t judge him on our views; he grew up in a much different time; & his autism kept him from growing. So it’s OK.
In the end I want to send out a prayer to Nolen's soul. I forgive you. You couldn't help having autism. I pray that God accepts you home. Much like you; I also have autism and failed people I loved; people who love me. I also need to be prayed for. I too am a sinner. But I declare my love for my beautiful caring soon to be ex-wife Karen (she was too good for me); and for my wonderful children Storm, Autumn, and Alex Cobb. May God always watch over them. I also wish I could have been kinder to my family and hers after I got sick. Hopefully I have done something Nolen couldn't figure out how to do. I did it here on his behalf. I did it because I remember times when we were alone and he'd break down. He'd set on the ground and cry he'd say I'm your dad, I'm Angies dad, I love your mom. But then the confusion of autism would take over, and he'd pull a Jeckle and Hide on me. He'd stand up, yell I'm not your dad, and take off like a freightened rabbit. He didn't know how to deal with his autism. I think had I just went over, hugged him, called him dad, and told him I loved him during those moments it would have caused a great change in both our lives. But I couldn't deal with my autism either. I am so glad that about 14 years ago I went up there and called him dad and told him I loved him. I forgive you dad; you couldn't help having autism, we couldn't be together on Earth, but we can in Heaven, may you rest in peace man.
I'd like to say I turnef out a lot different from Nolen. Well for years I did. I was a good dad and husband. Loving and caring. But then my kidney disease caused some mild anerisms; and I started acting a lot like Nolen. I left a good job and retreated to my house. Eventually; I pushed people out of my life: my mom, my sisters, my nieces, my wife's family. Then I stopped thanking my wife for working hard (I was now on disability: like Nolen). I started letting her do way too much of the housework; and didn't thank her for it. I got to where I rarely hugged her or told her I loved her. I started spending more time talking about myself than listening to her and my kids, and asking how they were doing. Like my mom she got tired of it; and I now find myself living all alone. That happened right about the time Nolen died. I'd been kicked out about 2 days before he died. Oddly enough; I went to see Nolen a couple of times after he nearly died. He rejected me, then asked me not to return. That was the catalyst that caused me to become so recessed and self-focused that my wife couldn't take it anymore, and she asked me to leave. I wasn't just my dad's son anymore; I had become my dad. But unlike my dad; I am calling my wife and children and alpologizing. I'm accepting that I have autism and don't know everything. I'm not always right. I may fail. I may be doomed to live out the rest of my life alone. But I want them to know I'm sorry and that I love them. I showered my children with love when they were little. I hope my kids turn out better than me. Spending weeks all alone in a hotel room eating bread and water is not the life anyone should want. If you have autism; accept it, and fight to overcome it every day, the best you can. If you love someone with autism be patient and understanding with them. They dont mean to be that way. Be blessed.
My mom was a good woman, and loved Nolen. She worked hard. My sister Angie loved him completely, and looked just like him. I was a smart strong kid; I just needed a dad to hold my hand and teach me things. But I was born with wavy hair and rare beutiful German eyes. I love my eyes. Many people have told me how beutiful they are. Nolen could have a happy life with all of us for all those many years. Instead; he threw it away. This caused all 4 of us a lot of pain and anguish. He didn't do it because he was mean, he did it because he was autistic. So I forgive him. I pray forgiveness for his soul. I loved him. I'm writing all of this so if anyone reads it and had ill feelings toward him they will realize it wasn't his fault; autistic people can't help being what they are. God made them that way; and he wants us to love them, because they are our brothers and sisters in Christ. Part 15
I took my kids to see Nolen. They are all beutiful, and look a lot like the Cobbs. But they are built like German warriors. Two have identical blue eyes to his. One is very high level autistic. He and Nolen took to each other instantly. They started talking about very complicated theories that were earily similar. Two similar minds happy to finally have a similar mind to communicate with. But then Nolen noticed my son was trying to avoid bees and pollen (he has severe allergies). Why's he doing that Nolen asked: he has allergies I replied. Well Nolen declared he didn't have allergies. So I tried to open Nolen's eyes, they were obviosly very similar humans for a reason. I said he is very high level autistic. Well; it was time for us to go, because Nolen wasn't autistic, so this must not be his grandson. My son is an intelligent, wonderful, kind Christian person. Yet he was dismissed for having autism. Nolen just couldn't accept that my son and I were just a little odd because of DNA we inherited from him. Part 14
Nolen always wanted a son; yet when his son named Nolen Cobb drove up to see him he could never accept me. That wasn't meanness, that was his autism. My eyes were always my curse. They proved I couln't be his. Well; they are the rarest recessive eyes in the world (Nolen and Linda both had ice blue recessive eyes. Angie has rare eyes also, with pretty blue rings in them). Mostly Germans, Scandinavians, and North Scottish people have them. Some English and Irish do too. They were more common in ancient German royal families. Oh wait; my moms dad was descended from them. You know I could have easily shown Nolen all of this scientific research; but he didn't want to see it. He knew more than science. Autism. Absolutes. Part 12.
See I was taller than him; and I had a large strong body build. So did my mom. In fact my height and build looked just like her German dad. I guess he didn't realize she had a dad. I tried to inform him of that as a kid; he told me Germans were bad, his dad fought them in WWII. OK; but my grandpa's family lived here when the war started, just like Nolen's family. As I said; absolutes, mom's dad was bad because he was German, even though he was an American. His family had been ancient German royals, the Prussians ran them off before WWI. I don't think it occurred to dad that his family had also imigrated here. I once pointed out that they made Indians act dumb in old movies. He said Indians must be dumb. He didn't seem to realize that Indians didn't really act the way they were betrayed in movies. I found it odd that he thought Germans were evil, and Indians dumb, yet he chose to have sex with a woman who thought herself an Indian, and who haf a German dad. Part 11
When I grew up and visited he'd ask about my mom and sister. It never occurred to him to drive a short distance up the road and talk to my mom, or pick up the phone and call my sister Angie who worshipped the ground he walked on. She emotionally depended on him so much, yet he couldn't properly return that love. His autistic traits hurt all of us, yet we all still loved him. Everytime I visited he'd point out my wavy hair. He didn't have wavy hair; and hey, mine was thinning, his wasn't thinning, I couldn't be his son. I'd point out how I had a kidney disease, and the medications were causing my hair to thin. Kidney disease; he didn't have a kidney disease. No; but my mom's mom did. And baldness is determined by the mom's genes, not the dad. It would have been nice if he could have read a modern Biology book, but he was smarter than all the scientists in the world. In fairness; I've often been accused of thinking I'm smarter than all the scientists in the world. Honestly; I really think I am, even though I'm obviously not. My fathers son. I'll admit; there are times I wished my mom had cheated so that I would be a different person. Part 10.
